


I'll Be Good For You

by Burning_Up_A_Sun



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Banter, Bottom Harry, Crups (Harry Potter), Harry has a lot of sex, Kneazles, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Snark, Social Media, Top Draco Malfoy, naked calendar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-08
Updated: 2016-05-08
Packaged: 2018-05-27 03:14:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6267319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Burning_Up_A_Sun/pseuds/Burning_Up_A_Sun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry swears his naked calendar will outsell Draco's naked calendar.  They snark over their bad break up, and then, well, it is the Draco tops Harry fest...</p><p>This was originally posted anonymously on 4/2/16</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'll Be Good For You

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the LJ Draco Tops Harry festival. [DTH](http://dracotops-harry.livejournal.com/314161.html)
> 
> The title and the lyrics used in the song come from [Leslie Odom, Jr's version of Good For You](https://leslieodomjr.bandcamp.com/track/leslie-odom-jr-good-for-you-ft-daveed-diggs) Please listen, because it deserves your love. and Yeah. it's just actual liquid sex. 
> 
> Huge thanks to GeronimoandbeMAGnificent, CrowGirl, and ElizaJane and DaniBee. You're all to blame for 7k words

“Listen up, friends! It’s time to get naked.”

Blaise swaggered into the office’s bullpen waving a clipboard over his head to a chorus of groans. “C’mon. Our nudie calendar is the highlight of the year…”

George, slumped over his keyboard in mock anguish, lifted his head just high enough for Blaise to receive the full weight of his glare. “Ugh. For who? Crazy cat ladies?”

“We raise a lot of money each year for charity.” Blaise aimed a good-natured _Vinculum_ at George, which lifted him up in his seat like a marionette. “A lot of money. And that is good for our company and for our jobs.”

“Funny you mention cats.” Pansy walked slowly into bullpen, her hand massaging her lower back. “Luna is in charge of this year’s calendar because I’m ready to pop.” She caressed her pregnant belly. “I want to go over a few things before maternity leave.”

Blaise preened behind his clipboard with a wink that said _I did that_. Pansy smacked his arm.  
The office door blew open, the knob striking the wall behind it, and all heads turned--even though they knew who it would be.

“Good morning.” Harry groaned as he touched his wand to the darkened lenses on his eyeglasses, removing the shading spell. He shielded his eyes from the overhead lights. “Merlin, it’s bright in here.” Harry changed the spell on his lenses, darkening them again.

“Look who’s come late again,” Draco grumbled as he turned his back to the door.

“Didn’t used to bother you when I came late.” Harry laughed at his own innuendo as his friends groaned.

Pansy sighed in exasperation. “Harry, two things. Number one: it’s after noon. Not morning. Number two, I thought we agreed you wouldn’t come in hungover.”

“We absolutely agreed. I just ran out of hangover potion.” Harry dropped his backpack on his desk as he perched on the corner closest to Draco. He flashed a giant, toothy grin because it would completely annoy Draco.

Blaise side-eyed his wife and, as he watched the vein in her jaw throb, attempted to defuse the bomb.

“Go get the potion now,” Blaise hissed at Harry through clenched teeth.

Harry put one finger in front of his lips to shush Blaise. “Don’t yell.” He slid off the corner of the desk, knowing the meeting would wait until he came back, un-hungover.

Clear eyed and still smiling, Harry sauntered back to the bullpen, directly to Pansy. “I’m sorry, honey. I’ll stock up. Promise,” Harry said, kissing her cheek and gently touching her belly.

“When are you going to tell Blaise that this baby is the product of our love?”

Pansy shook her head and bit back her smile; Blaise snorted.

Harry moved to Blaise. “I’m sorry, honey. It won’t happen again.” He kissed Blaise’s cheek and patted his tiny paunch. “When are you going to tell Pansy that this is the product of our love?”

Blaise playfully pushed Harry away. “For Merlin’s sake, you’re depraved. Just go sit down.”

Harry returned to his seat. He smiled at Draco, waggling his eyebrows. “Date me again, Malfoy. I’ll be good for you. Treat you like a prince.”

Draco looked up from the parchment where he’d been doodling. His eyes were cold. “Is that what you said to that guy you were kissing in the club last month?”

Harry grabbed his chest. “You wound me.” He made a show of pretending not to be hurt by Draco’s words.

Draco’s voice chilled Harry. “Hmmm. I can’t imagine what that must feel like.”

Harry’s grin faltered as he tried to appear relaxed in his desk chair. “I told you. I didn’t do--”

“Leave that shit outside my office.” Pansy rolled her shoulders, hoping to release some of the tension from these two idiots. After the war, _The Daily Prophet_ had been one of the first to accept that _some_ Muggle technology _might possibly_ be worth exploring, which led to _**Beauty and the Beat**_ , a website for wizarding social news. Hoping to cash in on gossip and jealousy, _The_ _DP_ chose the smartest, most beautiful, most popular witches and wizards to staff it.

Someone chose so, so wrong. She and Blaise and Malfoy, sure. But Potter, Weasley, Lovegood, and Longbottom?

Ok, maybe Longbottom. Puberty had been very, very good to him.

Pansy looked back at her clipboard. “Before we were interrupted, I was about to tell you this year’s charity-- _The Kneazle and Crup Association.”_

Luna sat behind her desk, beaming as she twirled her hair around her finger. “Yay! I love animals.”

“You can’t.” George hid his face in his palms with a groan. “We can’t put a calendar out for KaCa. The shite jokes won’t stop.”

Blaise bit his lip and turned to Pansy, whose face had flushed as she glared back. “Obviously, someone didn’t think of that. And we’ve already told them it’s a go.”

“This is going to be brilliant,” Luna announced dreamily, unbothered by trivialities such as being in charge or silly names. “Crups and Kneazles are perfect. And they’ll be so easy to work with.”

George snickered. With the Crups and Kneazles that had made their way into the Burrow over the years, he knew without question that nothing about this would be perfect or easy.

"I would prefer not to pose with a dog," Draco said, holding his hand up to stop any other suggestion.

Harry snickered. "Dogs too low-brow? All that drooling and slobbering?"

"Obviously not. I dated you for a month, didn't I?" Draco smirked as he looked at Harry with a so, there! head tilt.

“Oh, Merlin. They’re starting,” George whispered very loudly to Neville. “Again.”

“I wish they’d just fucking get over it.” Neville shook his head in disgust.

“Or fuck and get over it.” Luna whispered very loudly from across the room.

Harry flipped them off. He held his breath for a moment before he responded, attempting to rein in his temper. “I thought we were pretty great together. Was it really so horrible?”

Draco rubbed his chin, pretending to think. “Well. On our one month anniversary, you went to get us another round of drinks in the club. When you never came back, I went looking, and you’d apparently gotten so involved sucking some guy’s face off you failed to remember you were with me. And it didn’t seem like you cared.”

“I tried to explain but you wouldn’t listen. He kissed me. How many times could I--”

“Enough!” Pansy crashed her clipboard against the desk, hoping they’d shut up. And if she were lucky, they might pay attention. “Everyone is posing. Neville. Luna. Draco. George. Harry. Blaise.” She pointed to each employee as she named them, her black-polished nails catching the afternoon rays of sunshine filtering through the office windows.

George covered his eyes, but left his fingers gapped. “It’s like the Judas Kiss. Except it’s a nail. It’s the Judas finger. She’s fingered us all.”

“Merlin, you too?” Harry deadpanned and everyone groaned.

~*~

After work, they stopped by the _Leaky Cauldron_ for a few minutes. The seven appropriated a corner table before it became too crowded. Harry bought the first round of Firewhisky after correctly guessing the color of Pansy’s knickers.

“There must be an easier, less sexually harassing way to pick who buys the first round—than figuring out what color my knickers are,” Pansy smiled at Blaise, who’d suggested the method.

Harry said _skin colored, because she’s au naturel_. But when Pansy dipped down the elastic waistband of her maternity trousers to reveal no knickers, Harry complained in shock. “Women wear pants. It’s a universal truth.”

“Why should they when you don’t?” George said, slapping Harry’s back.

“You said you wouldn’t kiss and tell, George Weasley.” Harry feigned embarrassment, but the table knew from George’s blush that Harry wasn’t joking.

From the side of his eye, Harry saw something pass across Draco’s face--surprise then disappointment. _Fuck him. He left me because he didn’t trust me, so why should I give a shit what he thinks._ His shoulders slumped. _Why do I give a shit._

“Knut for your thoughts,” Luna said, nudging Harry. “You look so far away.”

“Nothing a shot or two won’t take care of!” Harry pasted on a smile and threw his Firewhisky back.

Blaise and Pansy begged off after an hour. “Pans isn’t feeling good. The Healer said they’re false contractions, but they still hurt like hell.”

By the time it came back around for Harry to buy, only George and Neville remained at their table.

“Why’re you such a dick to Malfoy?” George asked, which came out more like, why yadicta mafo?

“Not.” Harry had lost count of how many shots he’d had, but he thought he counted eight glasses. They wouldn’t stop moving around the table, so he wasn’t sure. “Besides, deserves it. Won't listen.” Harry’s fingers mimicked a yapping mouth.

Neville sprawled on his chair, his legs extended under the table and his head lolling back. “He...you.” Neville made a heart with his hands.

“Did. Doesn’t.” Harry had switched to Muggle beer, which wasn’t seeming like such a good idea, according to his swirling stomach. He sighed. “Wish he did.”

“You like him.” Neville said, his voice rising as he tried to speak more clearly. “Tell him for real.”

Harry laughed and shook his head. “Told you, won’t listen. I wodn’a done that to him. Liked him too much.” He tried to steady his voice. “Still do.”

George rubbed circles on Harry’s back. “S’ok. It’ll work out.”

“Think so?” Harry smiled and pushed his hair out of his eyes.

“Sure.” Neville said, but grimaced to George when Harry wasn’t looking.

~*~

The loo door opened, and a still-sober Draco stood in the doorway, listening to everything his coworkers said. Even drunk, Harry still maintained his innocence. _I saw him. I know what I saw_ , Draco thought. _Or, maybe I don’t._

 _Still do_ , Harry had said.

When it was his turn, Draco stepped into the Floo. For the first time in almost a month, Draco looked toward Harry and smiled.

 

~*~

When Hannah Abbott announced _last call_ , Neville and George had long since left. Harry stood at the bar, surrounded by beautiful men and women. He had his pick of any of them. Take them home, enjoy their company in so many ways, kick them out, and still grab a few hours of sleep. He licked his lips as he looked each one over. Too tall. Too thin. Too dark haired. Too something.

Not enough something.

Not enough snarky, smart-ass, blond.

Not enough Malfoy...

Harry went home alone.

 

~*~

 

Restless all night, Harry eventually fell asleep as the sun rose. He felt as if he’d slept for only minutes when he heard a noise in the distance. It started and stopped. Started and stopped, coming closer each time.

Harry rose from the fog of hungover sleep to know it wasn’t his alarm clock. He swatted at the bedside table, finally realizing he needed to turn off his freaking phone.

By mistake he swatted the buttons that answered the phone and turned on the speaker.

"What the fuck are you still doing at your fucking house? I am in goddamn labor in the worst fucking pain I've ever experienced in my life, and I have to deal with this bullshit because Luna the Star Princess has no idea how to use a mobile. The photoshoot has already started. Get your bleedin’ arse out of your goddamn bed into the fucking shower and down to the photography studio. Or. Else."

Stunned, Harry listened for the first 10 seconds before he jumped out of bed and moved as quickly as he could to the loo. He didn't dare hang up the phone because he had no doubt she would leave the delivery room and _Avada Kedavra_ him.

When she finished and Harry thought it almost safe to hang up, he heard Blaise whisper. "Mate, don't fuck around. Do what she says. She scares me."

From the background Harry heard Pansy loud and clear. “You _better_ be fucking scared. Because _you did this to me._ And I’ll. Get. You.” Harry heard something that sounded like a groaning shriek, and hung up.

He scrambled into the shower, thought he remembered the hair removal spell, got it wrong and singed half of the hair from his chest before he could stop it.

He threw on yesterday’s clothes and jumped into the Floo with a handful of the emerald green powder. “Dennis Creevy Photography.”

Luna and Dennis had decided on an organic, spontaneous approach to the shoot, unencumbered by any rules or constraints. The Crups and Kneazles chased each other around the studio as Dennis, who thrived on the chaos, shot picture after picture.

George stood naked with an Irish setter who kept running past him. Harry hoped, as he heard the click of the camera shutter, that Dennis was timing them right and that some part of the dog would cover George's dick.

When it was Draco's turn, he dropped his robe to reveal a small, tan Speedo bathing suit.

"That's not _fair_ ," George whined, still standing naked, the setter now sniffing George’s arse. Why does _he_ get to be covered?"

"Perhaps, in its natural state, my penis is too large to be covered by a cat." Draco raised his eyebrows and smiled.

Harry chuckled, which irritated Draco. “What are you implying, Potter?"

“Who, me?” Harry stared pointedly at Draco’s Speedos instead of answering further.

Draco turned his back to Potter and dragged a rocking chair onto the backdrop. He sat with a stark white Persian Kneazle on his lap.

When he leaned over to kiss the cat between his ears, Dennis sighed. "Draco, that is so sweet. That will be _perfect_ for the cover of the calendar."

Harry grumbled at the idea that Draco would be featured. “Anyone can look adorable with a cat in their lap.”

Draco snerked. “You think I look adorable?”

Harry grabbed the Persian from Draco’s lap, but Draco wouldn’t release it. “This is a nude photoshoot.” With one eyebrow raised, Draco pointed at Harry’s clothes.

“I’m sorry, Harry, but it’s hard to be naked with your clothes on.” Luna chewed on the end of her quill, forgetting it had been inked. Black splotches surrounded her lips.

With a _yeahfinewhatever,_ Harry pulled his shirt over his head and dropped it on the floor. He toed off his trainers and pushed down his sweatpants, leaving it all in a pile. Draco noticed a Kneazle sniffing around and strongly suspected that Harry’s clothes were about to be used as a litter box.

Dennis cleared his throat as he eyed Harry. “I see you tried to use the depilatory spell.”

Harry stared at his half singed/half hairy chest. He looked at Draco, who ran his palm down his perfectly smooth chest.

“Goodness, Harry.” Luna cocked her head and the spaniel in her lap did the same. “Did the pixies get to you before you could finish?” She placed the puppy on the floor, where it immediately pooped. Luna patted the dog’s head with a _good job_! “I’ll just—” Before she could spell Harry’s chest, the dog doubled back and peed on Luna’s foot.

Harry’s eyes begged George, Neville, and Draco. Please don’t let Luna near me.

“You’ll be cleaning that dog mess.” Draco called over his shoulder.” I’ll help Harry.” With a well-executed flick of his wand, Draco removed the hair and the singe. “You owe me,” he mouthed to Harry.

With a deep sigh of thanks, Harry looked at his chest. “Oh, Malfoy. I’ll make sure I thank you. Several times.”

Draco shook his head at the innuendo. “Can we just get this done? That would be favor enough.”

Luna handed Neville a hairless cat named Sphinx, explaining that it had told her that Neville would be a perfect match. Of course she said giggled and pronounced it purrfect.

Neville tried to cuddle the cat, but he didn’t understand one thing about animals. Plants, yes. Animals, no.. He held the cat as close as he dared, but the creature was all straight legs and piercing claws, pushing away from Neville’s bare chest, struggling to get away at any cost.

“For Merlin’s sake, Longbottom. It’s a Kneazle, not the plague.” Draco slipped his hands around the cat with more gentleness than Harry had ever seen from him. Draco snuggled the cat and crooned quietly until Sphinx purred in his arms.

“Sit down and let me shoot this.” Dennis motioned Draco toward the folding chair that he quickly transfigured into a plush armchair. “You’re a natural, Draco.”

Harry stood off to the side with a wicked grin. “You are a natural with pussy,” Harry agreed. “But what about with cock?” With a flick of his wand, he transfigured Sphinx into a Bantam rooster that, alarmed, crowed a _cockadoodledooooo_ and flew off Draco’s lap.

Draco jumped up, his hands clutched at his sides. “It’s gonna be like that?”

Harry opened his eyes wide and smiled. “I don’t know what you mean. It’s just fun for a good cause.”

Picking up his own wand, Draco healed the scratches from the rooster’s talons and spurs. “Oh, it’s on.” With his own wicked smile, Draco moved off to the side of the backdrop, avoiding the steaming gifts the dogs left like landmines.

Harry’s smile faltered, but he stepped forward. Luna brought him a sleeping dachshund and placed it in his arms. The puppy wiggled until it burrowed its face in the crook of Harry’s neck. From the side of his eye, he saw Draco smile; it didn’t register that he was reaching for his wand.

“Smile and cuddle in!” Dennis called to Harry, standing in the middle of the backdrop. With the puppy’s soft fur, Harry found it easy and for a moment, he imagined adopting this pup and sharing a home with this baby and Dr—

The next moment, a Great Dane wriggled in Harry’s arms as Harry struggled to hold on..

“Malfoy!” Harry’s voice carried over the barks and meows in the room and even over George’s guffaws.

“Is something wrong? Pot-ter?” Draco bit back his laugh. He shouldn’t let Potter get to him; he knew better and one of them had to be the adult.

Luna sat in the armchair with cats climbing over her as the camera clickclickclicked. She smiled as if this were the only place she wanted to be.

George separated Harry and Draco, keeping them on opposite sides of the photo shoot. When it was his turn with a springer spaniel and a Snitch (specifically made for training hunting dogs), he left Luna in charge of Harry and Draco who’d wound up on the same side of the background.

Luna stared at Harry and cocked her head like she was listening to something. “You know, Harry. Sometimes people who are sexually indiscriminate are really looking for one person. The right person to have an adult, mature relationship.” Luna picked up Sphinx, who’d returned to his cat self, and nuzzled his head.

“Are you implying I’ll have sex with anyone?” Harry sputtered as his voice rose.

Draco snorted with dismissive laughter. “She’s not implying it. She _said_ it.”

Luna stepped between Harry and Draco before their month of verbal snipes and barbs became physical. “Look, Harry! It’s your turn. Talk to this Crup and see what she wants to do.”

Harry rolled his eyes. _Talk to the Crup_. But when he saw the dog, his irritation melted. This baby was what the Dursleys called a mongrel. She was old and trembled; Harry didn’t know if it were from old age or the chaos. He crouched down and checked her ID tags. “Isabella. I’m going to call you Bella because you’re beautiful.” He didn’t even realize that Dennis had moved in closer and continued to shoot.

Draco hesitated then crouched down next to Harry, as he whispered to Bella. He dropped his hand to Harry’s bare back, a sheen of sweat from the heat of the lights. Draco didn’t feel that--just the dual shocks of need and want that he’d suppressed and ignored for weeks.

Draco leaned close to Harry’s ear. “I’m sorry for what I said. It was too--mean.” Bella licked Draco’s lips, and Dennis captured Draco’s shock and Harry’s pure delight. Draco looked into Harry’s eyes. “Do you think we could--talk sometime?”

Harry tried to hide his surprise. “Sure. I’d--like that.” He kissed the top of Bella’s head before the dog walked away, leaving the two men standing naked and awkward in the center of the lights.

 

~*~

 

Blaise slammed open the studio door, his jaw dropping at the free-for-all. Crups and Kneazles running, hissing, howling. And the stench. Good Lord, the smell.

Luna had returned to the arm chair, drawing more Kneazles than before. She was the sole point of calm in the turbulence, petting the cats and chatting with them as if she were in a room by herself.

“What in Merlin’s name is going on?” Blaise raised his voice to be heard and everyone stopped except Dennis. The _clickclickclick_ continued.

“We’re having the photoshoot,” Luna answered, offering a kitten to Blaise. “You have clothes on.”

“I came to show you baby pictures, not get undressed.” Blaise reached into his jacket pocket and quickly lost his phone to the crowd of coworkers, cooing over pictures of an exhausted Pansy and their baby girl.

“Blaise, they are gorgeous.” Draco beamed at his friend. “When can we visit?”

Harry ignored Draco. “She’s beautiful. ”

“Yes,” Blaise answered, his voice thick. “She’s beautiful, like her mother.” He turned from his friends, to wipe his eyes.

Dennis called for a break while he pulled the digital photos up on his computer. His willingness to use Muggle technology made him a no-brainer for the calendar.

“I have a ton of Harry and Draco, and they’re wonderful.” Dennis turned the computer so they could all see the shots.

Instead of joining the crowd, Draco searched for his trousers and spelled them clean from the puddle of what he chose to assume was water.

“Merlin, I. Look. Good.” Harry crowed, back to his over-the-top self. George slapped his back with a cheer. “You know you want a piece of this.” Harry wiggled his naked ass to punctuate his statement.

George laughed at Harry’s brazenness. “Dammit, Harry. We all do. You make women swoon and straight men weep for their heterosexuality.”

Draco gagged.

“C’mon, Draco. Look at this.” George ran his hand up and down the air in front of Harry, whose cock was still semi-erect as it had been most of the photo shoot. “He’s a good lookin’ man.”

Draco turned and smiled, running his hand up and down in front of himself. “Not as good lookin’ as me.”

Dennis turned his back before he laughed in an attempt to be professional. He turned back to Blaise and continued his previous thought. “We have more than enough pictures for two calendars. Especially of Harry and Draco.”

“I have an idea.” Harry kept his voice casual as he spelled his clothes clean. He knew a way to Draco to his suggestion that they talk. But would Draco fall for it?

“ _The Kneazle and Crup Association_ need money, and this calendar is a good start. But let’s do more. In addition to the printed calendar, let’s do two digital—one of Malfoy and one of me. We’ll sell them for a limited time. It’s win/win/win. The shelter wins because it makes more money. _The Prophet_ wins, because it will generate publicity and more traffic for the site. And I win, because, well, I’ll win.” Harry’s heart beat faster, hoping Draco would take the bait.

“ _You’ll_ win?” Draco laughed and shook his head. “I don’t think so.”

**_Hook._ **

“Wanna bet?” Harry sucked in his cheeks and wrinkled his brow, hoping he looked angry.

“Sure, because you’ll lose.”

_**Line.** _

“What do we bet?” Harry didn’t breathe. He almost had it.

Draco grinned. “The date you’ve spent the past three weeks begging for…”

_**Sinker.** _

Harry opened his eyes wide, as if that would be horrible.

“…Winner choses, loser pays.” Draco smirked. “And I have very expensive taste, Potter.”

“I’m sure you do, Malfoy. But you’re not going to win.” Harry patted Draco’s shoulder. “Gotta run. Got to plan my media blitz.” Harry threw a wave over his shoulder on his way to the Floo.

Neville watched Draco, who looked brighter, more energized. “You ok, mate?”

The Persian Kneazle wove her way through Draco’s legs, a perfect figure eight. He crouched down to scratch the cat’s head. “Better than I have been in a while.”

 

~*~

 

 ** _TWIZARD:_ ** Connect with your Wizard friends — and other fascinating people. Get in-the-moment updates on the things that interest you in Wizard society. And watch events unfold, in real time. In 140 characters.™

 **Harry Potter** _@theChosenPartier: @BeautyAndtheBeat_ followers, I’m fighting _@DMalfoy1_ for my honor. Choose #NakedPotter and buy my calendar. All proceeds go to @KaCA.

 **Draco Malfoy** _@DMalfoy1: @BeautyAndtheBeat_ followers, _@theChosenPartier_ has no honor. And I look much better #NakedMalfoy. Buy *my* calendar at our website.

 **Pansy Zabini** _@PansZ_ : @Dmalfoy1, @theChosenPartier Who approved this ridiculous idea?

 **Pansy Zabini** _@PansZ: @Dmalfoy1, @theChosenPartier_ *ridiculously wonderful idea.

~*~

 **Trends:**  
**#NakedPotter**  
55.9K Tweets  
**#NakedMalfoy**  
55.8K Tweets

 

~*~

The website crashed.

~*~

 

 **Harry Potter** _@theChosenPartier_ : I’m in the lead over _@Dmalfoy1_ for calendars sold. I’ll make an awesome wallpaper for your phone or computer. BC I’m hotter. #NakedPotter

They sold 25,000 the first day, which was double the run for the printed version.

 **Harry’s Wife** _@wishing4HarryLyfe_ : I bought 10. Also new hashtag #HotterPotter

 **SlytherIn** _@Hoggywarts: @wishing4HarryLyfe,_ please. #NakedMalfoy has class and what looks like a huge c*ck.

Which resulted in a series of degenerating tweets about cock size and what could be seen and not seen in the calendar. Which also led to a particularly graphic series of RPF fanfics about Draco and Harry. #DrArry

 

 **Trends:**  
**#NakedPotter**  
95.9K Tweets  
**#NakedMalfoy**  
95.8K Tweets  
**#HotterPotter**  
25.1K Tweets/Trending for 2 Hours Now  
**#DrArry**  
Hottest Trend

 

Harry read the stories. Out loud.

At work.

“Oh look, Malfoy. This one says, “Draco lined his throbbing cock against his Chosen One’s rose pucker and pressed in…”

No one complained. They were operating under the old wives tale that the more you ignore something, the faster it will go away.

It had been three days.

“It’s cute how they think I’d bottom,” Harry said to no one in particular. “I’ve been known to, but y’know, he has to be really special. Or she.”

George groaned and Harry said, “Hey, I wonder if there’s any fanfics about strap-ons.”

Draco banged his head against his desk. “Isn’t this sexual harassment? Don’t we have a right to work without being subjected to—him?”

“Alright!” Harry punched the air. “Thirteen fics. Me and Pansy. Me and Hermione. Aww, that’s nasty. She’s like a sister to me. Oh, me and Ginny—”

George growled. Literally growled.

“Ok, Ginny’s off limits. Here’s one with me and Malfoy, where he wears a hollow strap on because apparently, I like it girthy.”

“Oh, God.” Draco whimpered, still hitting his forehead against his desk.

Luna brushed her fingers through his hair as she walked by. “It will be alright. Maybe he only wants to go to a Quidditch match or something.”

“Great idea, Luna!” Harry smiled brightly and flashed her a thumbs up. “I was thinking we wouldn’t even leave my flat.”

Draco plugged in his earbuds and hoped that the Wagner could drown out the mayhem.

~*~

After one week, at 11:59:59pm, Blaise called the contest over. They’d sold over 100,000 calendars and drew more new readers and subscribers to the two websites than they ever thought they could.

Even Pansy was happy with the results.

She catered a party for the midnight reveal of the final numbers, with Harry and Draco tweeting and urging their supporters to continue buying the calendars even after the contest ended. The baby slept through the hubbub.

Blaise poured champagne into the paper cups as Luna counted down to midnight.

**Trending:**

**#NakedCalendarReveal**  
Trending Now  
**#IChoseHarry**  
Trending Now  
**#IChoseDraco**  
Trending Now  
**#US4HotterPotter**  
Trending Now

The results were irrefutable. Harry’s calendar had been purchased 86,313 times. Draco’s had been purchased 86,312 times.

“I demand a recount.” Draco yelled over the noise. Harry watched Draco, whose voice sounded angry but his body was easy and loose.

“Draco, honey. There’s no recount. The numbers are right there.” Blaise petted Draco’s shoulder, trying to soothe him. On some level, Blaise knew that his cackling laughter wasn’t helping Draco at all.

“Let’s do this thing soon.” Draco held his hand out, to stop Potter’s gloating.

Harry nodded, and for a moment, the smallest second, he thought he might have seen a smile pass Draco’s lips. “Tomorrow. Meet me at Grimmauld Place after work.”

Harry cleaned up his desk and informed his bosses that he’d be taking tomorrow off to fully prepare for his date. He pressed a finger against Draco’s lips. “Don’t worry, my prince. I’ll be gentle with you.”

Before Draco could bang his head against his desk, Harry was gone.

~*~

Draco had expected Harry to choose some £1000 per meal restaurant or a grubby, sweaty dance club. Maybe a grubby, sweaty sex club.

He never expected to be in a an art cinema with a total of four people waiting for the 1938 version of _A Christmas Carol_ to begin.

No innuendos. No erotic fan fiction readings. No sexual advances, no nudity, not even snogging. He seemed--if it had been anyone besides Harry, Draco would have said that his date seemed nervous. Asking if the choice of movie were alright. Checking that Draco’s seat was comfortable. Making sure he had enough popcorn. It was a bit--adorable. Draco bit back a smile all evening.

Instead of watching Ebenezer Scrooge’s transformation, Draco watched Harry. The lines on his forehead when he frowned. The crinkles at the corners of his eyes when he smiled. The way his shoulders shook when he laughed.

When the third ghost appeared, Harry’s face was filled with the same hope for redemption that Scrooge felt. Draco’s breath caught as feelings he’d denied flooded back. Draco rolled his eyes, hoping that any tears would stay put and not slip out.

Harry turned to him. “What? What is it? Why do you look like that?” Harry asked, his voice wobbly and defensive at the same time.

“I look like that because it’s my face, Potter. Watch the movie.” Draco shoved another handful of popcorn into his mouth to stop from giving himself away.

~*~

“Thank you for a wonderful date.” Harry stood on the steps of Grimmauld Place, one higher than Draco and kissed his cheek. “I had a nice time.”

“Me, too,” Draco said, surprised by the truth in his words and the butterflies swirling in his stomach.

Standing there, watching Harry fumble for a key in his pocket as if he were a Muggle, Draco knew, if he didn’t do something fast, the date would be over. He couldn’t let it end here without talking.

“What happened in the club that night?” Draco blurted out, grabbing Harry’s arm and not letting him leave the steps.

Harry sighed and covered Draco’s hand with his own. “I went to get us another round. A stranger came up to me. He said, I heard it’s good luck to kiss _The Chosen One_. He plastered himself to me before I could even tell him to fuck off.”

“Then I saw you.” Draco’s whisper barely reached Harry’s ear.

“Then you saw it. Him. By the time the bouncer pulled him off, you were gone. I tried calling, texting, I even went to your house.”

He knew Harry was telling the truth. When he’d come home, tears burning his eyes, Draco had buried his face in his bed pillows. He listened to Harry bang on the front door and yell for him until Harry’s voice turned hoarse.

Draco squeezed Harry’s hand. He swallowed hard and forced himself to look Harry in the eyes. “I’m so sorry. I should have listened.”

“I’ve never lied to you, Draco. I wouldn’t.” Harry’s voice was tinged with sadness. “You meant too much to me.”

Draco cupped Harry’s cheek, and Harry leaned into it. “Meant?” His heart stuttered as he waited for Harry’s answer.

Harry searched Draco’s gaze, his face, trying to read him in the dim light the street lamp provided. “Do you mean--”

Draco closed the distance between them. Hesitating for a moment, he gently brushed his lips over Harry’s.

Harry froze, his shoulder rigid under Draco’s palm. When Draco pulled away, heart pounding as he tried to breathe, Harry drew him back in, wrapping his arms around Draco’s waist. Their bodies fit together, muscle memory recalling their past to their future.

“May I come inside? For coffee or--” Draco asked as they broke apart to smile and to breathe.

Harry nodded and unlocked the door. He allowed Draco to walk through first, and for Draco, it felt like coming home. He closed his eyes and smelled Harry’s cologne, the faint smell of burnt toast, the jasmine air freshener. The familiar scent that was Harry’s home.

Harry smiled and took Draco’s hand in his. As they sat in the silence of the kitchen waiting for the kettle to boil, Draco thought about Harry’s words, about the warm weight of their hands.

“This was the nicest date I’ve been on in a long time, Potter.”

“Watching old movies is my favorite thing to do.”

Draco smiled, biting his lip. “Not reading erotic fan fiction out loud to torment your coworkers?”

Harry laughed, a genuinely happy sound that made Draco’s heart miss a beat. “That’s a really close number two.”

“Good, because I’d hate to think the coworkers felt incredibly awkward for nothing.” Draco laughed, his breath stuttering when Harry squeezed his hand.

“We were pretty decent together, y’know.” Harry scraped his chair away from the table when the kettle whistled. He brewed the pot of tea, keeping his back to Draco. “I think, if we tried, we could maybe possibly have like, an actual, honest-to-Merlin grown up relationship.”

“Is that what you want, Potter? Harry. A two-bedroom house in the suburbs, wife, cat?” Draco took the mug from Harry.

“Something like that.” Harry’s eyes softened as he smiled when he sat back at the table. “Maybe a multi-bedroom in Islington, a husband, a dog.”

Draco shivered theatrically at the word dog. “Common. Dogs are so common.”

“If you give ‘em a chance, dogs’ll love you unconditionally. They’ll protect and defend you. They’re brilliant cuddlers and can lay in bed with you all day. Y’know. If you give them a chance.” Harry looked everywhere except at Draco.

Draco’s knees felt weak, and he thanked Merlin he was already seated. “Cats are discerning. They choose one person to love, and they don’t share. Usually, they will fight to protect their own with as much ferocity as they love. But sometimes they’re stupid.”

Harry moved his chair closer to Draco’s, their shoulders touching. Draco felt on fire where their shoulders and fingers touched. His brain short-circuited and he found the words, “Dogs. Brilliant.”

“I’m not actually talking about dogs.” Harry closed the already small space between their bodies and brought his hand to Draco’s cheek, his thumb gently caressing it.

Draco’s breath hitched at the unexpected touch. Harry’s mouth was so close. He leaned into it. “Not talking about cats.”

Draco brushed his lips over Harry’s.

Harry sighed and returned his kiss, his thumb still tracing Draco’s cheek.

Draco rested his forehead against Harry’s. The intimacy of breathing Harry’s air was exhilarating. “I want this so much.” Until the moment he said it, Draco hadn’t realized how intensely he felt. “But I won’t be a one-nighter. I want a relationship.”

Harry kissed Draco, nipping his bottom lip as he pulled away. And he did it again. And again, heat pooling in the pit of Draco’s stomach. He broke the kiss, and when he spoke, his voice was thick. “Good, because I’m not interested in a one-nighter.”

Draco stood and reached his hand to Harry. He hesitated, but allowed Draco to lead them up the stairs to the lounge, stopping occasionally to touch Harry. To kiss him

Harry lit the fireplace and started the music before dropping his wand on the table. Draco slid his iPhone from his back pocket and placed it next to Harry’s wand.

The music swirled around them, surprising Draco with the heat in the singer’s deep, sensual voice.

_I just wanna look good for you. Baby can I look good for you?_

“Merlin, what is this song? It’s like sex.” Draco wrapped his arm around Harry’s waist, took Harry’s hand in his and moved to the music.

“I love it. Makes me think of you. It’s on repeat.” Harry said as he closed his eyes and brushed his cheek against Draco’s. He whisper-sang low in Draco’s ear.

_I know how to make it good for you. I’m gonna be good to you._

Harry’s whiskers scraped Draco’s cheek, and Draco wanted to feel them against his body, his hips, between his thighs.

Draco’s cock pressed against his flies, and he felt Harry’s erection through his jeans.

_Trust me I can take you there…_

Draco slowly unbuttoned Harry’s shirt, kissing the skin as he exposed it. Harry whimpered each time Draco’s lips touched him. His neck, the dip in his collarbone, the wispy hair on his chest, down lower. Harry slid his fingers through Draco’s wild hair, the product that usually kept it tidy now long gone.

Draco pulled the white shirt from Harry’s jeans, pushing the final few buttons through their holes to reveal the line of fine, dark hair that disappeared into the waistband.

_Syncopate my skin to your heart beating…_

Draco whispered gonna leave your shirt a mess on the floor as he slid it from Harry’s shoulders. Harry pulled Draco in, kissing, nipping, sucking.

“Want you. You. Only you.” Harry murmured against Draco’s lips between kisses, his fingers struggling with Draco’s tie and shirt buttons.

One word. “Yes.” Draco pulled away to look in Harry’s eyes. Something there, he’d never seen in anyone else’s eyes. He knew Harry. He wanted Harry.

**You say I get hard so bad, never want to leave you, I won’t.**

Draco struggled to pull his wand from his back pocket and with a flick, the rest of Harry’s clothes disappeared. Draco slid to his knees.

_Been waiting for the first day you say yes…_

He wanted to torment Harry. To break him down and build him back up moment by moment until Harry begged, but he couldn’t this time. Harry was too close. Draco was too close.

Draco grasped Harry’s ass and pulled him forward, taking just the tip of Harry’s cock into his mouth. Draco breathed in Harry’s soap and his need, and slowly dragged his tongue over the slit.

He looked up at Harry, whose eyes were closed, his dark lashes flickering. Harry was stunning, standing naked in the firelight. Draco wanted him here, like this, forever. He’d been so stupid to waste that time. Arguing with Harry when they could have been together.

Draco’s cock ached from the need to be against Harry. Inside him. To fuck in and drag out as Harry begged him not to stop. He pulled off and looked up at Harry again, whose eyes were now open and focused on Draco.

“Come here.” Harry’s voice was soft, laced with need.When Draco stood, Harry pulled him into a hot, filthy kiss as they touched, pressing against the bulge in Draco’s trousers. “Want you,” Harry said between kisses. “Want you here with me. Never leave. Please. “

Draco drowned in the kisses, a willing participant. In Draco’s head, the song and Harry’s mouth and hands and words merged into need and desire. He struggled with his clothing, finally grabbing his wand from the table and spelling them gone. With a swish, he cast a protection charm. With wandless magic, Harry accio’d lubricant.

Draco eased them to the sofa. “I want to look at you,” Harry said, lying on his back. He slid his hand around Draco’s cock, twisting his wrist at the head.

Draco’s breath hitched at the touch. So good, so so good. “Don’t or I’ll come.” He leaned down and kissed Harry, slow and deep as he teased Harry’s entrance with his slick fingertips..

“No.” Harry’s breath caught as he wrapped his fingers around Draco’s wrist. “I want you. Inside. Please.”

Draco pressed inside and gasped at the warmth and intensity of the squeeze of Harry’s muscles. Being inside Harry, of knowing him like this again overwhelmed Draco. He rasped out a sob as he finally rolled his hips.

“Fuck, Draco. You feel—” Harry wrapped his legs around Draco, pulled him closer, thrust up as Draco fucked in, over and over. They let the music speak with them. For them.

_Trust me I can take you there, Trust me I can take you there._

Harry babbled the most beautiful words Draco had ever heard. “You’re beautiful, oh my god Draco, you’re so...you feel amazing, so good. So good. I’m so sorry. So sorry.”

“No sorry. No..” Draco leaned as far as he could to kiss Harry. “Love you.”

Draco’s hips lost their syncopation as Harry cried out, pulsing between them. The perfect squeeze of Harry’s muscles around Draco’s cock sent flares of pleasure that pushed Draco over into his own orgasm. He crashed his mouth against Harry’s, craving the one final point of connection.

Panting and spent, Draco collapsed on top of Harry, resting his head on Harry’s shoulder.

_I just want to be good for you._

Harry regained some ability to speak. “Jesus, I’m never gonna be able to listen to this song without getting rock hard.” He laughed and kissed Draco’s head. “What time is it? Can you stay tonight?”

Harry reached for Draco’s phone to check the time. Draco’s wallpaper was from the photoshoot—Harry, crouched down whispering to the senior Crup. “Draco. You bought my calendar.” Harry sounded surprised.

“Duh.” He grabbed away his phone from Harry and returned to the music.

“But you lost by _one_.”

“I never intended to win.” Draco wrapped his arm around Harry’s waist, holding him tighter.

“Did you cheat?” Harry tried to raise himself up on his elbows, but Draco wouldn’t move. Couldn’t move.

“I didn’t know how else to talk to you.” Draco’s face flushed, but he smiled as he looked up at Harry.

“You could have said, Harry, can we talk.” Harry imitated Draco’s best public school pronunciation.

“I did. And I do not sound like that, Potter.” Draco dropped his feet to the floor and stood up, using Harry’s shirt to clean their mess. “But, I think maybe we do need to talk a little more.”

Harry watched Draco struggle to find the words. “Come here.” When Draco stepped closer, Harry wrapped his arms around Draco’s waist and laid his head on Draco’s stomach. “We do. But I’m glad you’re here. You’re good for me.”

“You’re good for me too, Potter.” Draco smiled and dropped a kiss on Harry’s head. “God help us.”

“Hey, Malfoy.” Harry stood up and took Draco’s hand, lacing their fingers. “Stay?”

Draco brought Harry’s hand to his lips. “I’ll think about it.” Draco laughed as Harry gathered him into a hug. “Fine. But don’t blame me if this time I don’t leave.”


End file.
